Your story sounds so much like a 30-year relationship I let go of during the pandemic. Like you, I began dreading her calls until finally, I told her I needed a break from our monthly phone chats which I used to enjoy. Unfortunately, she was suffering from a mental condition related to a thyroid condition that she refused to acknowledge. She even called my daughter a couple of times, which pissed me off, but finally got the hint after about a year. The lesson I learned from her was how to establish and maintain strong boundaries.